It's okay...

I was talking to a friend yesterday and could hear her exhaustion and worry enveloping her words as she said, “I know what’s true but…I’m still here. I still feel shaky and just full of uncertainty inside me. I keep reminding myself of truth but I just want to sit down and not have to keep walking with my knees feeling so wobbly.”
Her rawness.
Her honesty.
Her bravery.
Her awareness.
Her strength.
Her beauty that she recognized as weakness.
But I also know that her words echoed how I have felt so many times and how so many of us feel, especially in certain seasons of our lives that feel more trying Than others.
It’s like you coach your spirit and you show up and you’re doing it and you wonder why you’re still struggling with the thought of, “I thought I was supposed to feel better about this/more firm in this/more in control of this than I am.”

I listened and we sat in it for a little while. I asked questions. She searched her own soul for answers, realizing she hadn’t given much time to assessing. I told her I didn’t want to pretend like I knew when the wobbly knee feeling would end but the longer she kept standing, despite her flesh feeling shaky, the more she would see her Spirit rise firm within her and the unshakable rock hold steady beneath her.

I think we confuse liking how something feels with being faithful. They aren’t the same. Even Jesus asked the cup to be removed from Him in the garden of Gethsemane before He took the cross; His desire was still to do the Father’s will but it doesn’t mean His knees weren’t wobbly and His spirit wasn’t grieving as He kept forward.

So…it’s okay if you feel a little shaky in the place you are, even when you know it’s smack dab in the middle of where He’s asked you to be…
It’s okay if you don’t love how it all feels and you’d change some things if you could…
It’s okay if you’re tired and you don’t feel super spiritual—it’s often the deep digging of our souls that happens when the emotions aren’t what lead us to Him—but rather desperation…
It’s okay if you’ve been here a minute and you still wish it wasn’t all so uncertain…

The unshakable Rock. In every kind of forecast, He secures your safety 🤍